Pancake!

5039: A Blue, Black Shade of Love - Valaena Targaryen

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Title: A Blue, Black Shade of Love
Perpetrator: TheWeepingRaven
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: I believe the cover is meant to show off how beautiful our Sue is. She’s dressed in a “modern” dress which is of a maroon color. The shoulders and sleeves are semitransparent with a leaf design.
Summary:James Potter has been in love with Valaena Targaryen since he first laid eyes on her in first year. Valaena's feelings couldn't be more different towards the boy she considered to be an arrogant toe-rag. When James comes across a mysterious time-turner he stole from his father's office, and turns to Valaena for help, the two are suddenly thrust into an unknown and uncertain future.” The summary is extended inside the story with, “
However, beautiful, fierce, and intelligent Valaena doesn't always get what she wants. Even if she is a Princess. Her desire to be not bothered by James Potter this year, is all but denied by the troublemaker that won't take no for an answer. […] When James comes across a mysterious time-turner he stole from his father's office, and turns to Valaena for help, the two are suddenly thrust into an unknown and uncertain future. So many things are different eighteen years from their own time. Severus and Lily are married with children. Severus is a Potion Master's, Lily is the school's Healer, Sirius a Head Auror, Remus the school's history professor, Maddox the potions professor, while Frank and Alice are essentially brain dead. […] So many other people they cared about are dead or traitors. Voldemort is gaining more power by the day and their once safe haven is in danger. The most shocking part of this unexpected trip is the fact that she has a son with the person she despises the most. Not only that, but she and James are dead, by the hands of Lord Voldemort, while trying to protect their son. […] For once, trying to work together is harder than one would think, especially when the duo try desperately to change their futures. With the help of their old and new Hogwarts friends, will they succeed in making James and Valaena fall in love and survive what is to come?
Full Name: Valaena Targaryen
Species: She’s Harry – I mean Haery’s new mother.
Hair: See markings.
Eyes: See markings.
Markings: “…she brushes away strangs of her silver-gold colored hair that fell into her beautiful violet eyes.
Possessions: There was a very long list of, “Pairings: James Potter/Original Female Character(s), James Potter/Valaena Targaryen, Rhaegar Targaryen/Original Female Character(s), Rhaegar Targaryen/Valaena Targaryen, Elia Martell/Baelon Targaryen, Sirius Black/Helaena Targaryen, Shaena Targaryen/Einar Arryn, Shaena Targaryen/Original Male Character, Lyanna Stark/Daeron Targaryen, Galeana Targaryen/Aldous Dayne, Alyxaenya Targaryen/Hadrian Lannister, Aemon Targaryen/Walda Frey, Jacaerys Targaryen/Cassiopeia Malfoy, Viserys Targaryen/Margaery Tyrell, Jonaerys Potter/Daenerys Targaryen, Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen, Jonaerys Potter/Robb Stark, Jon Snow/Robb Stark, Khal Drogo/Visenya Targaryen, Visenya Targaryen/Aegon VI Targaryen, Aegon VI Targaryen/Rhaenys Targaryen, Visenya Targaryen/Rhaenys Targaryen, Visenya Targaryen/Aegon VI Targaryen/Rhaenys Targaryen, Aegon VI Targaryen/Prince, Rhaenys Targaryen/, Sansa Stark/Jaehaerys Targaryen, Ashara Dayne/Ned Stark, Brandon Stark/Catelyn Stark, Robb Stark/Jeyne Westerling, Dean Thomas/Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger/Jaime Lannister, Lavender Brown/Ron Weasley, Fleur Delacour/Bill Weasley, Lorcan d'Eath/Charlie Weasley, Hannah Abbott/Susan Bones, Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood, Arthur Weasley/Molly Weasley, Theon Greyjoy/Daphne Greengrass, Severus Snape/Lily Evans, Lucius Malfoy/Narcissa Malfoy, Remus Lupin/Marlene McKinnon, Robert Baratheon/Cersei Lannister, Cersei Lannister/Original Male Character, Cersei Lannister/Jayke Lannister, Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth, Blaise Zabini/Draco Malfoy, Tracey Davis/Sally Ann Perks, etc.
Connection to Canon: Lily is replaced by an OC who is better than her in every way. (I mean, look at the summary.) The first part of the story involves her bemoaning, well, here is a line from said part. “His little followers are another reason why she can’t stand the Marauder.” Prior to this sentence we get a few paragraphs about why she doesn’t like him, but then paragraphs about how she doesn’t like the others – except, she praise Sirius and Remus and dispraises Peter. In reality, it is so we can get an info dump on certain things like the fact Sirius is to marry her sister Helaena. She then goes back into complaining about James. He’s apparently a womanizer, though him bullying others is a legit reason to not like him. That said, how many people actually cared whether he bullied Snape? For some reason the list now includes “Xenophilius Lovegood, Samara Selwyn, Godric Max and her now ex-best friend Maddox Montague, whom she’d known since her childhood years.” Most of those were OCs, but there’s nothing that says James or anybody bullied Xenophilius. He’s also now also apparently disrespectful towards teachers. (Would you guys argue Fred and George were disrespectful towards their teachers simply because they pranked people? As such, I’m not sure where this is coming from either.) James’ part goes into how much in love he is with her to the point he “…steps closer and leans in, his head dipping closer towards her. He inhales and he can smell Cherry Blossoms, vanilla, and something smokey.” And the writer wants us to root for these two to get together? It’s bad enough this breaks up James and Lilly. He gets close and then – she blurts out that she knows “it’s a time turner meaning you and I need to get as far away from each other as quickly as possible… “ because “…it’s dangerous for two time turners to be around each other at the same time Potter!” We don’t know where they even came from, but this rule about being near each other isn’t canon either. This results in our poor Sue blacking out. We then find out she and James were legally married when she turned fourteen because her father made her, but this is a stark contrast compared to chapter one which takes place in what feels like a modern Hogwarts and this which takes place in an older day. She’s stuck taking care of a toddler, but she also gets to see when she and James dies. We’re also supposed to believe that they eventually end up in the future so that she can see her wonderful son grown up after she’s died so that she’ll be convinced to get together with Potter, yet we’ve also got the issue of her being forced into a marriage in the second chapter which gets dropped very quickly as the writer drops the historical elements of GoT for the modern elements of HP.
Origin: We get the following “
Author Note: The main character is an original character, Valaena Targaryen (b. 260 AC), who will be the mother of Harry Potter. As much as I love the relationship of Lily Evans and James Potter, I wanted to do a story with a relationship between an Original Female Character and James Potter. […] Essentially, Harry Potter characters and the Wizarding World's locations (such as buildings and what not) all exist within the Game of Thrones/A Song of Ice and Fire Universe. So, such places like Westeros (and the Seven Kingdoms within that continent), Essos, Sothoryos, and Ulthos all exist together with places like Hogwarts, , etc. I imagine it as being located in Valyria, where it was rebuilt with Magic, perhaps cleansed with a ritual, along with other locations that were once doomed and destroyed.” We also get the following “Warnings (Including but not limited to): Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Murder, Attempted Murder, Rape/Non-Con, Attempted Rape, Strong Female Characters, R Plus L Does Not Equal J, Harry Potter is named Jaehaerys Potter, Jon Snow is named Jonaerys Potter, Jon Snow is a Targaryen, Jon Snow is a Potter, Jon Snow is Not Called Aegon, Jon Snow Knows Nothing, Jaehaerys Potter is called Haery, Valaena Targaryen is a BAMF, James Potter is a BAMF, Slow Burn, Established Relationships, Incest, Cousin Incest, Sibling Incest, Major Original Female Character(s), Major Original Male Character(s), Intrigue, Political Intrigue, Kings and Queens, Royalty, Court, Espionage, Magic, Witches and Wizards, Pureblood Agendas, Cults and their followers, Death Eaters, Lord Voldemort, etc.
Special Abilities: We’re supposed to believe not getting your way includes some guy taking no for an answer. We also get the line about how, “it’s like he expects every girl, except for Valaena and Lily, to fall at his feet and kiss the ground he walks on.” Meaning Lily is still in this, but he’s pursuing both of them. Actually, can I bring up the fact there is no evidence Sirius or James are womanizers, but that this characterization of womanizing is a very negative stereotype which shows up in a lot of Mary Sue stories.


Notes: The

Sample:
"What do you want Potter?" Valaena Targaryen demands as she brushes away strands of her silver-gold colored hair that fell into her beautiful violet eyes. She rests her hands sternly on her hips as her eyes look on at James Potter in disapproval. He has been the sole focus of her disdain and antipathy since her first year at Hogwarts when he tried to catch her attention by playing a prank on her. That was the first and last time he ever did a prank on the tall, slim and hot tempered Princess.

James has been infatuated with her since he first laid his hazel eyes on her on the Hogwarts Express' Platform Nine and 3/4. Over time he continues to fall hard for her day after day, year after year. He obsessed over the fiery, intelligent, amazingly gorgeous, and every other compliment he could think up, Princess. He follows her around like a love sick puppy and Valaena hates it.

Valaena has more than enough devoted followers following her around. As one of the Princesses in Westeros and ruling over the Seven Kingdoms, and has done so for centuries, she has had more then enough of men wanting her and thinking she was a good little submissive wife to her husband-brother Rhaegar. Considering she and Rhaegar have been married for the last three years, and within those three years, they had two children already, Visenya who is two name days old and Aegon who is merely six months. Valaena just couldn't wrap her head around why the Potter heir would want her? Especially since she was married with children already and for the fact that she wants nothing more than for the arrogant bully to leave her alone. It was thanks to her that James Potter has not been hurt, or worse, by her guards. They had been sent with her by her father King Aerys, when she decided she wanted to go to Hogwarts for her schooling.

 
Pancake!

5038: The Wizard of Harrenhal - Harry Potter

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Is telling other writers they’ve been featured simply because you’re ticked off you got featured worth said writer deleting their story? I bring this up because one of the Suethors featured recently did just that. I know because one of the writers they contact took things quite well, but I’ve now reason to suspect another did not due to the fact I was looking over my list for the HP/GoT stories I found to feature.

Title: The Wizard of Harrenhal
Perpetrator: DisobedienceWriter
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: None
Summary:The Master of Death, Harry Potter, wakes one cold spring morning in Westeros. He has no idea why he's there - or how he'll get back. Harry always had bad luck, but a lot of persistence. He'll need it. Winter is Coming.
Full Name: Harry Potter/Hardiven Rivers
Species: Master of Death (That is canon people!)
Hair: n/a
Eyes: n/a
Markings: n/a
Possessions: n/a

Collapse )
Pancake!

(no subject)

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Still working through the GOT stories I found.

Title: Fire and Shadow
Perpetrator: I LIKE FEAR 1-2
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: Their avatar is cover art for F.E.A.R. This was the last thing I looked at which was when I’d realized I’d featured a series from the writer before. That one was a crossover with Naruto and the entry can be found here.
Summary:The child born of Dragon and Wolf, was not alone, and he brought with him, something terrible. Rage and Domination, given flesh. That is what she was. For countless Millennia, she waited in the abyss, and now, finally her time has come. The one who would hold dominion over all the free people of the Earth, has returned, and she bring with her, fire and blood.
Full Name: Harriet Potter/Lyarra Snow
Species: She’s supposed to be Harry’s evil twin. Jon Snow may be Harry, but without the memories Lyarra got blessed with.
Hair:
Eyes:

Collapse )
Pancake!

5036: Magicans of the North - Persephone Bellatrix Black and Draco Lucius Malfoy

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

I'm still trying to get back into the routine of posting.


Title: Magicians of the North
Perpetrator: 10868letsgo
Sue-O-Meter: Awful
Cover/Banner Art: The cover is possibly a clip from GOT, but may just be a picture the writer wanted to represent their OC.
Summary:Catelyn Stark had a prophetic dream that her family is taken, slaughter and kill. She came to the Tree to plead the Old Gods into sparing her family and take her life instead. And just like that a boy and girl came upon her. Just who are they and why do they have magic?
Full Name: Persephone Bellatrix Black, Draco Lucius Malfoy
Species: They’re cousins in love with each other.
Hair: See markings.
Eyes: n/a
Markings: For some reason Draco and Persephone’s dark marks are visible in GOT despite the fact Voldemort doesn’t exist as a living being in this world. Persephone is also described as “looks almost close likes norther girl, like brown hair and fuzzy curls and softens oval and gentle features.
Possessions:Judging by their clothing, he would have to guess that they must be some nobility of sorts. Yet he noticed their sigil on their cloaks that has a silver snake in the green background.
Connection to Canon: Draco and Persephone are making out only for the two to flee from Ferinir. We jump to Catelyn who is bemoaning the fact the future she sees is “punishment for not keeping her promise to loveless child, Jon Snow!” She then find Draco and Persephone, but the writer thinks the title “The Boy and Girl who Snuck in Winterfell” is a good title for them. Moving onto the second chapter, there is question whether they will live or not. They wake up and rejoice the fact they are free. They talk about potentially erasing memories.
Origin: Reading the first part of the first chapter, I was left with the impression that romances between cousins are societally wrong and thus Draco and Persephone are needing to flee to another world where they’ll be accepted. The writer is from the United States where cousin marriage is illegal in half of the states “outright”. As such they’re unaware of the fact such marriages are completely legal in the UK.
Special Abilities:Draco is not on a trusting side because of the bad history of witch hunts and propaganda of Muggle-born from his family .Persephone is caution about them, but she doesn’t hate all muggles and muggle-born. Next Chapter, Lord Stark and Lady Stark meet the wizard and witch.


Notes: The writer currently has sixty-six stories.  Of these stories only three are complete. Only two of the stories don’t involve an OC, or at least according to the character and summaries.

Sample:

The swamp is dark, gloomy and the air is stench of mixed smells. The forest on the edge of the woods are cover the foot to the ground of mist and fogs.

The shadows are moving that formed two people. "Keep quiet!" One whispered to the other, which she has nodded.

This is the only chance they got.

"Where do we go?" She questioned him whom he quickly replied, "Anywhere, but here. Somewhere, far, far away, so that both our fathers cannot find us and we can live in peace. Together."

He holds onto her body closely to his. He loves her. Despite that they are cousins from their mother side, but that never stop anyone in their family on marrying their blood. He doesn't care who her father is. She is not his father. And he is not his father.

He overheard that they are going to sacrifice her to make her bear another man's heir. He met him once or twice from pureblood parties.

He is a drunken and bedded many women. That man has no quells on hitting women if you pushed his temper too far.

He will never let her go through that.

"Amare," She spoke in Latin that means love.

He passionately kissed her. She moans and eagerly. Sounds of teeth clashes, trying to reach their emotions and bruising lips are pressed. He cupped her and stops to look into her eyes.

They smiled until….

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLL!

"Fenrir!" She gasped as she is being forced out of her trance to run.

"COME ON!"

He urged her.

They both ran as fast as they can.

"They're this way!"

Oh no! They are catching up to them.

They stop upon the tree that carves up a face and red syrups are dripping. They never had seen that kind of tree before.

"Draco, I will always love you till the day I die."

Draco Lucius Malfoy. Yes, this is her cousin and the man she has openly loved.

"And I will love you always, Persephone Bellatrix Black."
Pancake!

5035: Warriors, Slaughters, Nobles - Harry and Anwen Potter

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Also, here's another of the GOT fics I found.


Title: Warriors, Slaughterers, Nobles, Killers, Rulers the Potters
Perpetrator: Giselle Riddle-Malfoy-Potter
Sue-O-Meter: Awful (Content) and Toxic (Writing)
Cover/Banner Art: The writer’s avatar is a picture of an iquana.
Summary:Start little before events in Harrenhal. Harry and his twin sister Anwen are going to attend tourney of Harrenhal, and there start famous events with Rhaegar and Lyanna, Robert's rebellion, Ned start crush mysterious maid from Dorne, Harry and Anwen will found love interests from our least/favourite twins? full summary inside rating T for now
Full Name: Anwen Potter, Harry Potter
Species: Not the canon character, and not his twin sister either despite what the writer may think.
Hair: See markings.
Eyes: See markings
Markings: Here is the unneeded info dump at the beginning of the story. “
Rosalie Potter = Oldest potter kid looks like her father with red curly hair, bitchy, wants to be married Rhaegar
Harry Potter = Looks like her mother with Lannister beauty and has his father black hair, one finest jousters in Dorne older twin, no more Potter heir
Anwen Potter = Hailed to be most beautiful woman in Dorne , black long curly hair, pale skin like her twin, Lannister green eyes, not lady like, often called more Lannister than Potter
Paulus Potter = Heir of Potter house, looks like his sister but much uglier, often called man whore
Possessions:

Collapse )
Pancake!

5034: For Myself - Harry Potter/Blackfyre

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Here is day seven. I’ve not gotten through my list of GOT stories I found. In fact, today’s entry wasn’t originally on the list, but I ended up looking at it because one of the Suethors for a previous story mentioned they’d actually written one and that they hoped they wouldn’t get a toxic. The answer may provide a pleasant surprise for them, but the answer (full answer in the notes section) is why I decided to feature this one.

Title: For Myself
Perpetrator: Chaos65
Sue-O-Meter: Good (The grammar is a bit rough, but the writer is ESL)
Cover/Banner Art:
Summary:Harry always knew that his luck might not be the best. But to be sent to another world so Death could have more entertainment from his life? He might as well use this chance for new life and live it by his rules. For updated info, check my profile.
Full Name: Harry Potter/Blackfyre
Species: Master of Death – Sort of…
Hair: White, like his mother in this world.
Eyes: Violet
Markings: Nothing specific comes to mind, though I may have missed something. There was a lot of amazing detail in this story.
Possessions:Blackfyre, one of the most famous Valyrian steel swords. Once wielded by Aegon the Conqueror and then it provided a name for House of Blackfyre.
Connection to Canon: Harry dies and Death tells him he’s stupid but could have lived his life better. For example, Death says, “But let us go further, you go into the magical world without any information and you don’t even think about acquiring it. Now this one was really stupid. Most of the muggle-borns knew more about their new world than you.” Harry ends up in the world and “blacks out” so he can gain the memories of his past life in this world. He’s then forced to pretty much get the eight-year-old kid out of his life and death situation on Death’s whim. Later, Harry realizes showers don’t exist in this world. He also has to figure out how his magic works in this world, which isn’t easy. By using his magic, he sends some rocks out at a couple of thugs. He thus meets Bronn. He's bargaining with Bronn, but hopes the man won’t kill him in his sleep for the money left to him by this world’s parents. He doesn’t, but the next part is Harry learning to use a sword. He also works on learning about the world, a mistake Death notes he made in his previous world. He has a dream about a white dragon and decides to leave. Of course, the person who owns the ships has his own plans. He reflects on how the people of Qarth dress – which – let’s just say it was pleasantly amusing. He has PTSD flashbacks to his past life, but the method in which they’re triggered is realistic.
Origin: We’ve a Master of Death story – sort of. Death got bored because “now that you died my entertainment has ended. So I decided to give you one more chance.
Special Abilities: The writer brings up the fact Dumbledore did manipulate Harry but doesn’t exasperate it the typical levels we normally see. In fact, Harry’s actually told he’s to blame for some of his fate rather than making it about everyone else. Important is the fact Harry’s given a second chance for Death’s amusement, not because he’s “special” and a master over Death. No, Death is still their own master. “He finally figured out why transfiguration was not working. It turned out that after Harry stopped guiding the magic during the transfiguration, the wild magic began to run rampant, thus ending the change.” Of course, he has visions, but this is likely part of Death’s game.


Notes: Why did I decide to feature this one? It wasn’t just because the writer of the story brought it up on another entry, but because I’d finally found a story where the writer did Harry reincarnated into another world done right. I’d almost given up on finding one, but just four chapters in (that’s’ what’s posted) – I’d say this is a very good example of what to do. In fact, I’d like to thank the writer who honestly didn’t know I was looking for this for a very long time when they brought up their story.

Sample:

Collapse )
Pancake!

5033: Fire on Fire - Ansara Blackwood

Apologies for not updating awhile. I had computer issues and needed to get back into the routine of things again. I’ll be getting back to posting the Game of Thrones crossovers I found hopefully tomorrow, but in relation to that one of the Suethor’s or a fan of their work found out their story got featured here. I think the biggest take away I took from that was the commenter didn’t understand the Canon Sue pales to the actual canon character.

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Title: Fire on Fire (No, this isn’t a coincidence given Game of Thrones name as a book.)
Perpetrator: Garnet2015
Sue-O-Meter: Toxic
Cover/Banner Art: The writer’s avatar is from a live action series.
Summary:Ansara, a Lupavi, lives with her pack in the forbidden forest doing what is needed to survive. When her father denies Fenrir Greyback's proposal of an alliance, Fenrir kidnaps Ansara and forces her to be his mate. As the two breeds of werewolves get to know each other, Fenrir soon starts to realize he wants their bond to be real. Will Ansara deny him or melt into his darkness?
Full Name: Ansara Blackwood
Species: She’s a special kind of Werewolf.
Hair:Her hair was long and straight with a dark tint of silver.”
Eyes:Her eyes, grey and innocent.”
Markings:She had dark skin like Tytus, but of a mildly lighter shade.” We also learn, “She was tall, with curves and Fenrir could smell her scent from afar. It was the same as her runt. They were siblings obviously.
Possessions: She has a father named Tytus. Her brother’s name is Hieronymus. He’s the runt…
Connection to Canon: Apparently Dumbledore didn’t just let Remus go to school, but “my aunt and two uncles, go to the school late at night where they were taught to read and write. In return the entire pack learned to read and write. We became… literate.” Except, why does the pack need this if they can control their changes and thus could blend in with Muggles just as easily they could Wizards and Witches? They’re worried about Fenrir Greyback’s pack from encroaching on their territory. Suethor, PLEASE actually look up the canon regarding the actual wolf pack in the HP universe. Her brother wants to confront the guyhe’s warned not to go near the school to which, “I gave a noise of submission…” She disobeys but becomes curious regarding the students there. On her way back, she and her brother run into the “other” pack, but they refuse to join despite the offer of power. Fenrir wants a woman from their pack. (Good grief.) At the end of this chapter, we get the writer’s warning that their will be rape in this story. It’s of course our Mary Sue, because she’s just that special, but we’re also supposed to believe this rape is romantic because the writer clearly marked the story genre as Romance/Drama and the only characters marked are Fenrir and the OC. That right there is what gets this one a toxic rating.
Origin: Remus is called a “lower species of werewolves” in the one and only chapter which is up. Despite this, the Lupavi were illiterate until Dumbledore intervened.
Special Abilities:The Lupavi, we are called. Wolves who do not need the full moon to shift. Our wolf spirits are ours to command.” See the sample for the rest of this nonsense please.


Notes: Suethor, Harry Potter is not Twilight. Werewolves don’t roam in packs like they do in that series. Given this, I wasn’t surprised to find the writer has indeed written for Twilight. Actually – I think they came up with the name “Lupavi” because of Twilight.

Sample:

Collapse )
Pancake!

5032: Dragon Mistreess and the Khal - Avalynn Peverell

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.

Here is day six.

Title: Dragon Mistress and The Khal
Perpetrator: lillisa34
Sue-O-Meter: I debated between giving this one an awful or a toxic rating and finally decided to go with the toxic rating despite having only one chapter.
Cover/Banner Art: I believe the avatar is a picture of the writer.
Summary:Avalynn Peverell is running from Death Eaters and finds herself crossing a portal to another world. Special Thanks to betterintexas for being the beta for this story! I will be updating this story every week.
Full Name: Avalynn Peverell
Species: She’s a distant cousin to Harry Potter. “She was a trained Dragon Mistress
Hair: See markings.
Eyes: See markings.
Markings:She was petite, but strong for her size, brunette with green eyes.” I’m hoping the three deep gashes from the mountain lion become scars.
Possessions: She has a Firebolt. She has a dagger with which she attacks a mountain lion.
Connection to Canon: Draco chases her and she decides to fly into a random portal despite the fact Draco crashed. She knows the place is different, but seers tell Khal Drogo she is coming and will change everything before going back to her dealing with a mountain lion. She’s able to go one-on-one with this beast and kills it. This is all so Drago will take her on as a mate because not only is she a strong warrior, but he can feel the magic in her. She is conveniently able to speak their language.
Origin: It’s the first story which does not involve – wait, we did have one other which involved portals. Still, quite a few have involved the reincarnating of characters.
Special Abilities:Avalynn Peverell, the last of her line was a distant cousin to Harry Potter and this, to her complete annoyance, was another reason the Death Eaters wanted her.” No, that’s not a reason for them to come after her. She’s also a Dragon Mistress, which is a non-existent role in the HP universe. Draco also calls her a mudblood despite the fact he should know she’s pureblood, yet another thing which would not happen. She’s able to feel magic.


Notes: Is the summary the right place to credit your beta reader? This writer’s other stories uses the summary to include author’s notes as well. I wasn’t going to bring up the fact the writer said they would update every single week because they only had two chapters and these two chapters were months apart, but then I saw the content of the last chapter. It’s just an author’s note announcing they have writers block.

Collapse )
Pancake!

5031: The Golden Dragon - Harry Potter/Goldfyre

Don’t forget about the first bi-annual Pottersues Contest which is replacing the old annual Pottersues Contest. The theme for said contest is Gamer Fic. Since Gamer Fic is a rather new concept in fanfic, I’ve added links to three entries which feature a Gamer Fic. I’m also working on a list of common traits we find in Sue stories which make them Sue stories called More Than Thirteen Reasons Why.
Here is day five of Game of Thrones week.
Title: The Golden Dragon
Perpetrator: DarthImperius (Does anyone else who knows the Star Wars fandom think this is a wicked cool idea for a user name?)
Sue-O-Meter: Awful (It’s only three chapters in, so it could eventually end up being the toxic rating.
Cover/Banner Art: I’m guessing the cover art is related to Game of Thrones.
Summary:Having lived a long life, the soul of an aged Harry Potter is sent against his will into another world, to be reborn as the child of Daemon Goldfyre, the King of the Stepstones and blood of the dragon. The dragons of the Narrow Sea may be of other colours, but their words are the same as those of their ancestors - Fire and Blood. (Plot-Bunny story)
Full Name: Harry Potter/Haerys Targaryen
Species: One could say we have another master of death story, though this one does a slightly different take on the whole thing. He’s now of the Targaryen and Lannister family.
Hair: n/a
Eyes: n/a
Markings: n/a

Possessions: Death appears in chapter three and gives Harry the elder wand.
Connection to Canon: Death visits a very old Harry. He is now the son of Daemon Goldfyre. The first two chapters are about how special Harry is, being favored by death and the fact he’s got the most legit claim to the Iron Throne. Harry is described in the third chapter as, “the child had potential, but his mood usually could either make a session successful, or a complete failure. Unfortunately, it seemed that today they were leaning towards the latter, given the amount of frowns and grinding of teeth coming from his son.” Harry has dreams which upset him. It’s rather plot-what-plot. Later on he is visited by death and informed he can still perform magic. Harry remembers how to do magic, and it ends there.
Origin: We’ve yet another story where Harry gets reincarnated. This also utilizes fanon where Duncan is the son of Daeron Targaryen and “legitimized” so that someone could have a character with more claim to the throne, in this case Harry.
Special Abilities: Harry is special to Death, but what is new in these Master of Death stories?


Notes: For some reason this story has it’s own wiki page. How do you feel about these fanon wiki? Also, are all these crossovers I'm finding reincarnation stories.

Sample:

Collapse )