Thanks to xdreams_of_love for sending in this Sue!

TITLE: The Potter siblings and the fight againt destiny
PERPETRATOR: Ailin Revan
SUE-O-METER: (bad)

FULL NAME: Bellatrix Black
SPECIES: Witch
HAIR: dark
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: tall
POSSESSIONS: Lily's daughter, Alexis.

ORIGIN: "WARNING: Bella is not a Death Eater in this story, not a Lestrange and not crazy." So, she's some random "good guy" named Bella?
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Lily Potter's best friend. She helps Lily save her child, and keep her twin's true parentage away from evil!James. When James sends Lily's oldest child, Alexis, away she takes care of her as her guardian. She goes off to France to raise the child.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Is a find upstanding human being.

NOTES: I believe that the Suethor is not a native English speaker, so no comments on the prose or formatting please.

( Who are you and what did you do to Bellatrix? )

Two more days to nominate for the Golden Bubotuber Awards!

TITLE: Second Chance
PERPETRATOR: XrazorxpiesX
SUE-O-METER: (bad)

FULL NAME: Bellatrix Lestrange
SPECIES: Witch
HAIR: "tamed, curly (not frizzy), black, and was shinning again"
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: "she was not skinny anymore, she has meat in her bones, and her curves are perfect"
POSSESSIONS: a new wand: "Golden Snake tooth, Cherry with a bit of dragon’s blood, and it was size 11½."

ORIGIN: "Bellatrix wanted to give up the life of becoming a Deatheater, a criminal, and torturing innocent people, but until one day, she has the opportunity to become a teen again, and to start over. Bellatrix/Harry, slight of Bellatrix/Draco." No amount of my snark can make that any funnier.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Is sorted into Gryffindor. All the boys eye her, including Draco. She is both weirded out and flattered by this. She is going to begrudgingly befriend Ginny. Will be paired with Harry.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Is a good person.

NOTES: The Suethor ships Bellatrix/every HP canon character. Why?

( Why???? )

Send in your nominations for the Golden Bubotubers! Only 5 more days left!


TITLE: Fairy Tales, a Harry Potter Fanfic
PERPETRATOR: YamiPaladinofChaos
SUE-O-METER: (awful)

FULL NAME: Bellatrix Lestrange
SPECIES: Witch/helpless maiden
HAIR: not described, probably black
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: none described
POSSESSIONS: a wand she lets clatter to the ground in despair

ORIGIN: J.K.Rowling, by way of someone's idea of medieval literature. Which this is so not.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: is Bellatrix Lestrange? According to the Suethor at least.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Can spew floridly about her love for her knight *cough*Voldemort*cough*, can become a big wussy when faced with the loss of her tru wuv, applies the epithet the Dragon and His Bitch to Harry and Ginny

NOTES: Oh how purple is this text. It always amazing how people write to try to sound archaic. Mostly it sounds silly. I also object to the depiction of Bellatrix as a suddenly helpless kitten after Voldemort is killed. I like my Bella like I like my wank - full of the batshit crazy.

( Hath: U R Using it Wrong )

For the next little while, all the Sues I will be featuring will be from the backlog of recommendations. This means that you will several of the same minions being credited for finding Sues, please do not be offended or put off, I normally space frequent sub-mitters out to be more equal.

After I am done this, I will restrict the Sues that I do use from submissions. They should be "awfuls", "toxics", "good" or "trolls". No "okays" or "bads". Normally they are more on the boring side, and not hard to find.

Please do not send any submissions until I announce that I am accepting them again.

Thank you to abarero for sending in today's first Sue!


TITLE: Forbiden Attractions
PERPETRATOR: I LOVE KAREN
SUE-O-METER: (awful)

FULL NAME: Bellatrix Lestrange
SPECIES: Witch
HAIR: not mentioned, I'm going to assume black.
EYES: "beautiful violet eyes"
MARKINGS: "slim but curvy figure the skirt and boots showed very little cleavage."
POSSESSIONS: "a red sweater (a bra too), a black leather skirt (under garments included) and black boots that reached up to her knees", "a white bra and white undergarments, a white cashmere sweater, white leather pants, and white trainers",

ORIGIN: A 17-year-old Harry Potter saves the "virgin bitch" Bellatrix Lestrange from being raped in an alley by her husband. Harry brings her back to Hogwarts due to his saving people problem. She is grateful, for Harry's treatment of her.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Is saved by Harry Potter. Cries into his arms. Then she tells him that she was forced into marriage, but since Voldemort like her he spared her from consummating her marriage. Apparently she didn't torture the Longbottoms, she was framed. She only stunned Sirius because Voldemort demanded her to take action, she didn't mean for Sirius to fall into the veil. This happened all while she under the Imperius Curse. She eventually broke free and escaped. Her husband had caught her when Harry arrived. Only Harry has seen her naked. Harry proves to Dumbledore that she is innocent. She and Harry fall in love, and she lets him have sex with her. She is going to get to go to Hogwarts too. I'm sure Neville is going to forgive her just-like-that.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Is not the knife-wielding, Crucio-loving psycho we know and love. This Bellatrix is broken and in need of some T.L.C. She magically looks 20 years younger after spending time with Harry.

NOTES: I decree that everyone should go and read the whole story. Go now! I was almost in tears from laughing. I think we will have someone who is not Hermione nominated for Most OOC Female.

( I just can't see Bellatrix saying 'gonna', unless it's to mock someone. )