Potter Sue of the Day ([info]pottersues) wrote,
@ 2008-08-30 10:08:00
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Current mood: nauseated
Current music:Alone - Heart
Entry tags:related to harry, related to the weasleys, text-block-of-doom, toxic

I am now accepting entries for the Sixth Annual Pottersues Fan Fiction Contest! Get your entries in, and make sure you get reviews!


Thank you to [info]rowenaraven13 for sending in today's first Sue!

TITLE: Alex Potter's life at hogwarts
PERPETRATOR: Puppylover6948
SUE-O-METER: (toxic)

FULL NAME: Alex Potter
SPECIES: Witch
HAIR: a ponytail
EYES: sometimes filled with tears
MARKINGS: switch marks on her bottom.
POSSESSIONS: She wear pants in stead of a skirt. White undies.

ORIGIN: Puppylover6948 thought it would be interesting to write her own epilogue.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Is friends with "Fread" and George Weasley the II. She has siblings named "Lupin,Jackie and Albus". Er, his name was Remus. Anyways, Snape whips her as punishment, which is strange, seeing how Harry and Ginny would never stand for that crap. He sends her a "screamer" the next day. Then mad Eye and Sirius show up and they are all going to try and defeat Voldemort with Alex.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: She has a "mischievous" nature.

NOTES: There are several characters who should be dead, but aren't, like Snape, Sirius and Mad Eye. The Suethor tell us that "(IN MY WORLD NOBODY GOOD DIES YOU HEAR ME?NOBODY!!" Does that mean Voldemort won't die either? Everyone will co-exist happily with puppies and rainbows and spankings?


SAMPLE:

The next day after class Alex felt her stomach doing turns as she approached Snapes desk."This is so stupid.I can't belive I even cried last night...Now I'm gonna get my ass beat..."."P-p-professor Snape?Could I talk to you about something?"Snape looked up at her with a cold glance."Potter?What do you need?"Alex sighed looking at her feet."I-i-i wanted to confess to setting off that dungbomb in class yesterday."Snape sighed."Sure took you long enough you little liar."Alex turned her head the other way.She was used to Snape saying things like that."Well looks like you'll have to take your punishment like a real witch won't you?"He said walikng around the other side of the desk.He pointed at the corner."Go stand over there,Face the wall."Alex nodded tears stinging her eyes."Damn it...He knows I can't stand standing still for so long..He'll murder me if he has too...Tch it's not like I'm gonna cry over standing in a stupid corner."She thought as Snape left to get a switch.He came back with a switch and put it in the chair next to his desk.He than stood there with his arms crossed for a minute to see what she would do.She shifted from foot to foot every few minutes and Snape knew she was breaking."Okay Potter come over here and bend over the desk."He said."He's gonna kick the crap out of me I know he hates my guts."As she approached the desk she conveinently noticed the switch in the chair as she bent over."Well since you're attitude is that of an immiture second year I'll take it easy on you.So I'll be giving you thirty strokes with the switch."She nodded a small shudder going down her back.He than pulled her pants around her ankles(Since she wore pants instead of the customary skirts...Yeah she usually got in trouble for that too)Her face turned a slight shade of pink as her white underwear followed.He raised the switch just arms length and let it hit her backside.Alex gritted her teeth in pain as she felt the switch cut into her backside.After every stroke she felt more tears start to come she wiped her eyes as she gritted her teeth and felt the welts beginning to appear on her switch marks.At about twenty strokes she felt her shoulders shaking as tears began rolling down her cheeks.Snape of course chose that time to begin to question her."Potter why are you being punished?"She shook her tears away angrily as she despretly tried to kick some of the pain away."B-b-b-because I set off a dungbomb in class."She sobbed."And?..."She sobbed for a few minutes and Snape put the switch down."...A-a-and I-i- l-l-lied.."Snape nodded as he raised the switch applying the ten final ten strokes."And are you going to do it again?"She shook her head as she sobbed her heart out as Snape walked out to return the snape to where he got it.(Little did the owner know it had been being used for punishing gryffindor backside)And he came back."You may go now Potter."He said for once not using the mean tone he usually did.She nodded as she pulled up her pants and underwear and walked back to the common room."Oh and by the way Potter?"She turned a quizzical look on her face."Y-y-yes Proffessor?"."Sadly I'm going to have to tell your father."A look of fear instantly appeared on her face."N-n-no P-p-please I'll do anything Professor please!"Snape shook his head."Nope sorry it sure is gonna suck to be you tommorow."He said a smug smile on his face.

She rubbed her eyes quickly brushing away the tears outside the fat lady potrait.As she walked in she went to th couch and shifted uncomfortably.Everyone eyed her but Lupin he knew what she had done and instantly felt his heart drop.As the others left for whatever they were doing Lupin stayed as he wordlessly walked over and offered his back for her to climb on.He was only a little bit older than her but still he got a lot of what Alex was going through.She climbed onto his back and he carried her into the girls domitory.It seemed all the girls had left for some kind of event.He laid her on the bed and rubbed her back.She felt her tears come back as tears began to run down her face again."I-i-i'm sorry..."Lupin shook his head."For what?You did'nt do anything.This was all my fault I dared you in the first place,I got into the fight with Albus I should've been the one getting a beating."Alex shook her head."I-i-it's done now theres nothing we can do.."Now lets see that bottom!""Lupin said smiling as without warning he slipped two fingers into her waistband and pulled her pants and underwear around her ankles.She almost protested but he already had done it by the time she had ealized."That bastard really tore it up didn't he?Damnitt...I'll be right back stay here."He left and quickly went into the boy's domitory.He came back into the girls domitory carrying a small jar of cream."Heard from what Fread and George told me this is supposed to help if you get spanked.Thay said we're welcome to use it whenever we need."She nodded."I-i-is it gonna hurt?"He smiled sadly as he put some on his hand."They said it stings a little bit."He said as he rubbed some on her backside."Gah..A little?Damn that feels worse than the switch!"She said resisting the urge to put her hand back and rub."Calm down I really doubt it hurts that bad you're just being over dramatic."Alex turned her head her ponytail flipping through the air."What'd you say?You don't know pain until you get thirty with that switch!"Lupin nodded sarcasticly as he playfully landed a slap on her backside."OW DAMNITT!"She yelled her hand instantly going back to where it had made inpact."Lupin laughed."Sorry did'nt think it would hurt that bad!"She rolled her eyes as he rubbed most of the sting away.Not less than twenty minutes later they both had fallen asleep to tired for words.




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(119 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-01 02:55 pm UTC (link)
So she's Harry's daughter, snape is alive and so is Voldemort?

I'm very confused.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-01 02:55 pm UTC (link)
wow, first comment. That's never happened to me.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 12:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-02 12:53 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 01:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-02 01:06 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 01:28 am UTC

[info]wilver_and_ecru
2008-09-01 03:00 pm UTC (link)
I couldn't read that. The text-blocks of doom are too big. I got something about Snape and Alex having sex, or Snape raping her, or something. They're called paragraphs, dear, use them!

Actually, from what I've written in the above paragraph, I'm glad I couldn't read it. :P

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-01 03:10 pm UTC (link)
I don't think Snape actually screws her, he just beats her with a switch. Clearly the author has a spanking fetish as the second chapter only doesn't have spanking because "I could'nt find a place to put it..." She also has a Naruto fic that "CONTAINS SPANKING AND WHAT SOME MAY CALL ABUSE TO A CHILD!" I'm not brave enough to check it out.

After skimming (as Homer once said "You take a long time to say nothing!") the fic, other than the spanking fetish, it's pretty common sue crap. She doesn't just play the NotDead!Character card, her deck has nothing else. She openly admits it, though.

The thing is, if you're going to rewrite a story so that nobody died, you kinda need to fill in the blanks. Deaths like Fred and Colin can be worked around decently, since they happened right at the end, but Sirius being alive would kind of have a major impact on the story, as he'd probably be with Harry for the Horcrux hunt. Not to mention since Dumbledore is still alive, Harry would have the most powerful wizard in the world helping him.

Of course somehow, Harry appears to have failed, as Voldemort is alive and well. This more than anything needs to be explained, as it still seems that Harry & Co have had 19 years of peace and prosperity. Maybe Harry killed Voldemort, but since Good guys can't die, Harry can't get the horcrux out of himself.

Finally, I know Sirius is brash, but why would he bring an 11 year old, untrained wizard with him to fight Voldemort?

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]colbyucb, 2008-09-01 05:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]jai_chan, 2008-09-01 06:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]colbyucb, 2008-09-01 06:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-01 07:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]colbyucb, 2008-09-01 07:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-09-10 11:36 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]colbyucb, 2008-09-10 10:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-09-11 11:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]wittyilynamed, 2008-09-01 06:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]wilver_and_ecru, 2008-09-02 02:06 pm UTC

[info]feuillu
2008-09-01 03:02 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, I can really see Snape saying "Sucks to be you." Sure thing.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]wickedcooljul
2008-09-01 04:09 pm UTC (link)
That totally reminded me of "Avenue Q"

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]zoreta, 2008-09-01 06:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fallenidol_453, 2008-09-02 02:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoreta, 2008-09-02 02:07 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 12:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]colin_chaotic, 2008-09-01 08:41 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 12:24 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 04:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ohlily, 2008-09-07 01:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]icecreamempress, 2008-09-04 02:08 am UTC

[info]felicie4
2008-09-01 03:25 pm UTC (link)
SPACE BAR NEGLECT. MAKE IT STOP.

Seriously, it's one of the biggest keys. It's not hard to miss. (There's serious space bar abuse in the profile, too.)

(Reply to this) (Thread)


(Anonymous)
2008-09-02 06:37 am UTC (link)
Actually it's THE biggest key. :)

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]felicie4, 2008-09-02 04:16 pm UTC

[info]jai_chan
2008-09-01 03:37 pm UTC (link)
"."

I think this is my favorite part. Not only does it come with a side of grammatical failsauce, it also looks like a face.



Also, if Filch couldn't get corporal punishment okayed for all the years he tried, what makes Snape get to be Mr. Spanky-pants?




(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]jai_chan
2008-09-01 03:41 pm UTC (link)
Wait, I just noticed that Lupin smacked her ass. Her BROTHER smacked her ass. What the fuckity fuck kinda family is that?

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]carolpent, 2008-09-01 04:32 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]apinchofhope, 2008-09-01 05:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-09-10 01:14 pm UTC

[info]herilorum
2008-09-01 03:43 pm UTC (link)
AHHHH Text blocks of DOOM!!

My mortal enemy... FIE ON THEE!!

I can't be bothered to read anything in text blocks... I just can't...

(Reply to this)


[info]clichealert
2008-09-01 03:56 pm UTC (link)
...I'd think the kid of Harry anf Ginny would have more guts than that. I mean, Harry had the whole Umbridge punishment thing, and he didn't cry and grovel like this chick.

Is this girl being molested by her teachers AND her brother?

Speaking of the brother *see icon* his name is Remus. You don't name a kid Lupin. Huge Suethor mistake.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]bunnyinthemoon
2008-09-01 11:39 pm UTC (link)
Icon love. <3
But yeah. This fic is beyond messed up.
I hope this suethor does not have any children. D:

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]rodentfanatic
2008-09-01 04:03 pm UTC (link)
It's like she's trying to write BDSM, and failing amazingly. LKH?

(Reply to this)


[info]btyrhrtout
2008-09-01 04:43 pm UTC (link)
The most amusing thing is someone with a spanking fetish whose username is puppylover. It's amusingly incongruous.

(Reply to this)

LOL ANIME CHICK
[info]inotbob
2008-09-01 04:48 pm UTC (link)
Snape getting it on with an eleven year old snotty Potter kid.
I lol'd.
Did YOU lol? *Uncle Sam finger*

(Reply to this)


[info]rowenaraven13
2008-09-01 05:15 pm UTC (link)
"So Alex do you know the plan?"Alex raised an eyebrow."Plan?"Sirius put her on the ground and kneeled down to her height."Well for awhile you and the rest of the family are going to come to where we are now.So that we can do something really cool to stop someone bad."Alex looked at him seriously."I'm not five.So who are we stopping?Is it Voldermort?"Sirius smiled."Yep sure is!"

I have a stiff neck today. It hurts to laugh.

Edited at 2008-09-01 06:55 pm UTC

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]grammarfreak16
2008-09-01 10:08 pm UTC (link)
And then they proceeded to sing a campy musical number revealing the plan to defeat Voldemort which, of course, included a three minute long tap solo by Sirius (the campy musical number, not the plan).

Sorry, that image just popped into my head, and I had to share it.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-01 10:51 pm UTC
That made me giggle. - [info]bunnyinthemoon, 2008-09-01 11:41 pm UTC
Re: That made me giggle. - [info]deathnotesues08, 2008-09-02 08:03 pm UTC

[info]parcel_ribbon
2008-09-01 05:36 pm UTC (link)
I skimmed most of it, until I got to He than pulled her pants around her ankles , being British, my reaction was something along the lines of 'why is snape pulling down her underwear'in a worried tone of voice.
Then I hit Since she wore pants instead of the customary skirts and thought 'thank goodness for that! He's not quite as creepy as I thought.'
Until I continued reading...Her face turned a slight shade of pink as her white underwear followed
0_0

Also, wasn't Moody/mad Crouch Jr expressly told that physical punishment was not in use at Hogwarts?


(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-01 07:03 pm UTC (link)
Actually no. He was expressly told that performing magic was not allowed. He was also expressly told that the only form of punishment was taking away points or detentions.

Filch on the other hand made it quite clear that corporal punishment was not allowed, because he desperately wanted it to be otherwise.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]parcel_ribbon, 2008-09-01 08:27 pm UTC

[info]lostmustard
2008-09-01 05:38 pm UTC (link)
Think I'll stick to the canon epilogue thanks. It wasn't perfect, but my god, it was infinitely better than this.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]colin_chaotic
2008-09-01 08:43 pm UTC (link)
That's totally the Suethor's plan! Write this, to make people appreciate the canon! [/conspiracy glasses]

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]zoreta
2008-09-01 05:51 pm UTC (link)
Even with all the other things I could rant on, the thing that bothers me the most is having her brother in the girls' dorm. It was explicitly clear in the books that girls could enter the boys' dorm, but not the other way around- but I guess that comes from people who didn't read the books, only saw the movies.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]midoriri
2008-09-01 06:27 pm UTC (link)
How many of those d'you think were surprised to find "Harry Potter" in the Books category, not Movies, on ff.net?

Also, you just reminded me of THREE kids in my 7th grade English class who did a book report on Harry Potter, and only ONE who read the book rather than see the movie.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-01 07:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]midoriri, 2008-09-01 08:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-01 08:48 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]midoriri, 2008-09-01 11:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowenaraven13, 2008-09-01 09:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-01 10:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowenaraven13, 2008-09-01 11:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]midoriri, 2008-09-02 01:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowenaraven13, 2008-09-02 01:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoreta, 2008-09-02 02:15 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 08:09 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaos_sama9, 2008-09-02 12:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]midoriri, 2008-09-02 01:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowenaraven13, 2008-09-02 01:44 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaos_sama9, 2008-09-07 03:45 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]midoriri, 2008-09-07 08:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]rowenaraven13, 2008-09-01 06:31 pm UTC

[info]burninglikeice
2008-09-01 07:40 pm UTC (link)
IN MY WORLD NOBODY GOOD DIES YOU HEAR ME?NOBODY!!

Um, then why is Snape alive? He wasn't good. He just wasn't evil, either. And that also doesn't explain why Voldemort is alive. Extreme failure.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]rowenaraven13
2008-09-01 11:08 pm UTC (link)
Voldemort is dead. Voldermort is alive. I've come to a decision that many characters have a, I don't know the word, soul ray counterpart? that's easy to confuse with the original. Zambini is not the same person as Zabini, and Mione is a separate individual from Hermione. Then there's Longbottem, Dumberdore, Minvera, Snap, Magonagle . . .

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]burninglikeice, 2008-09-01 11:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 12:20 am UTC

[info]smallbluedog
2008-09-01 08:28 pm UTC (link)
This is so wrong. Two guys pull down her pants AND underwear in as many paragraphs and she doesn't protest at all... ick. And wtf is up with this Snape?! Why is there corporeal punishment?! >< Also, naming your child Lupin after a guy whose first name was Remus? FAIL.

(Reply to this)


[info]rowenaraven13
2008-09-01 09:25 pm UTC (link)
Okay, which one of y'all reviewed this story today?

"I'm not saying you are a bad author--" Say it. Just say it. "--nor am I attacking you." Why not?! "I just want to help."

Allow me to share a piece of wisdom that has saved me a great deal of anguish over what I can't change: "A fool convinced against his will is of the same opinion still."

(Reply to this)


[info]clockworktoast
2008-09-01 09:42 pm UTC (link)
This is the first Text Block of Doom I've managed to get through in a while, and....wow. Just wow.

I think my brain may or may not have just liquified and poured out of my head onto the keyboard.

(Reply to this)


[info]hecate_12
2008-09-01 09:59 pm UTC (link)
I couldn't read this. The big block of text really hurt my eyes.

(Reply to this)


[info]grammarfreak16
2008-09-01 10:16 pm UTC (link)
This annoys me. She makes an explicit statement that she wears pants and gets in trouble for doing so (an obvious attempt at feminism), but then she becomes a stuttering mess and just allows herself to be spanked. C'mon Harry. Tell your daughter to grow a pair!

(Reply to this) (Thread)


(Anonymous)
2008-09-02 08:51 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, totally. But remember, this wasn't just spanking. It was a switch. That left cuts. And made her bleed. I'm pretty sure that's child abuse . . . I mean, if you can't hit your kid with a stick wider than 3 inches or something (where I live, at least), why should you be able to slice them open? I think Snape just needs a little girls' blood for a potion or something and enjoys toturing Potters. Or maybe it's an imposter.

*gasp* I know! It's really a loyal Death Eater/Voldermort sent to kill the Sue 'cause she's so speshul and is destained to defeat him one day!

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-01 10:56 pm UTC (link)
So something that dawned on me. If all these people are still alive, why is Harry naming his kids after them? Is he just not that creative?

(Reply to this)


[info]pinwheeled
2008-09-02 12:10 am UTC (link)
Sometimes I think people should just write bad erotica instead of throwing in characters from fandoms. It's not like using those characters adds anything to the story.

(Reply to this)


[info]curlychikk
2008-09-02 12:11 am UTC (link)
Spanking just creeps me out if it's people over a certain age, and I HIGHLY doubt Snape would use it as punishment instead of, you know, making you clean disgusting crap out of cauldrons after class.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


(Anonymous)
2008-09-02 08:45 pm UTC (link)
I completely agree. I haven't been spanked since I was eight years old, and that was only by my parents. Menacing guy teacher who was in love with your grandmother? Ew. As one of the voices in my head likes to say: "That sounds kinky . . ."

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]chaos_sama9
2008-09-02 12:28 am UTC (link)
Spankings? Someone is letting their kinks in.

And you know, it's really freaking annoying when someone is so in denial about someone dieing that they have to write crap like this. I cried (and still do!) when I read Sirius's death, I cried when Hedwig died, and admittedly by the time Fred's death rolled around I was kind of expecting one of the Weasley's to die and just a little jaded because Jo was a little trigger-happy there at the end, but I was still upset. And you know what? I got over it. People die. Boo-fucking-hoo.

"Fread". I've never seen 'Fred' spelled that way before.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]little_masaouki
2008-09-02 04:59 am UTC (link)
There's a reason people died. Nobody dying kind of violates multiple messages of the story

1) One of the key things that Harry has had to learn, all the way back in front of the mirror of Erisad, is to sacrifice what he wants for the greater good.
2) One of Voldemort's greatest weaknesses (outside of him not knowing love) was that he feared Death over all other things. The good guys did not, they knew there were things worse than death. You kinda have to prove that message, and to do that some of them had to die. (Moody and Collin, I think, made that point the best)
3) The reason so many people died at the end, was because this is war. It's something horrible, disgusting, chaotic, and tragic. If no good guys die, then it turns into the Saturday Morning Cartoon version of war, and Snape will have tell retarded kids not to play on the railroad tracks before the ending credits.

Yes, Rowling might have gone overbaord, (I was very moved by Dobby's death) but her willingness to do this to her characters is part of what allowed her to create characters so great that we CAN be moved by them.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


(Anonymous)
2008-09-02 12:37 am UTC (link)
"And then the oral sex!"
"Oral sex! Oral sex!"
"I suppose I COULD stay here a bit longer"

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]chaos_sama9
2008-09-02 12:47 am UTC (link)
"You cannot stay, it is too perilous."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 12:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-02 04:59 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 06:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]little_masaouki, 2008-09-02 06:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-02 06:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]chaos_sama9, 2008-09-07 03:47 am UTC
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2008-09-10 04:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mornmeril, 2008-09-10 06:18 pm UTC

(119 comments) - (Post a new comment)

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