From the girl who brought us Lynx Potter?... this one is actually much worse.

TITLE: Trinity Snape
PERPETRATOR: Lady Knight Nick

SUE-O-METER: (how bad is it?)

	WRITING:
	SUEAGE:
	WRONGNESS:

FULL NAME: Trinity Snape
SPECIES: Human - possibly a witch, but I don't think any mention is ever made of her using any magic.
HAIR: Never described.
EYES: One gold one, one blue one.
MARKINGS: Other than bi-coloured eyes, nothing.
POSESSIONS: All kinds of nifty swords and stuff.

ORIGIN: Snape's daughter (natch), who hasn't seen her father in five years. *sniffle* Oh, the tragedy. She's only fourteen years old, but is coming to Hogwarts to teach - get this - 'warrior arts.' Yuh-huh.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Snape's daughter. Hagrid appears to have taken her under his wing, and Draco is, of course, attracted to her (I suppose this is preferable to his being attracted to his own half-sister in this author's other fic).
SPECIAL ABILITIES: The ability to hold the attention of a class she's teaching when all the kids are older than her. l337 ski11z with every weapon ever invented. Turning Ron Weasley's brain into week-old oatmeal.

NOTES: Somebody on marysues (I'll stop referring to them soon! I promise!) expressed a hope that perhaps 'Lynx Potter?' was Miss Lady Knight Nick's first fanfic. Perhaps she had grown and matured since then. It was a beautiful fantasy that gave everybody hope.

Then, stupid me, I just had to go and look.

Not only is 'Lynx Potter?' not a first fic, it's not even a worst fic! In fact, it's actually half-decent compared to this steaming pile. 'Lynx Potter' stretched credulity. 'Trinity Snape' pulls it out like silly putty until the microscopically thin ends don't actually snap, but just kind of lose hold of each other and drift away.

Let's go down things point by point, shall we? Ridiculous name of main character? - check. I dunno about anyone else, but hearing 'Trinity Snape' gives me weird mental images of cyberpunk Hogwarts. Ridiculous appearance of main character? - check. Love them bi-coloured eyes. Sorry, but the only character who can get away with bi-coloured eyes is Kopii Rezo. Ridiculous reason for character to be present? - Woah, boy.

Hufflepuff help us, this girl, young enough to be a student (since she's not, I suspect she's a squib, in which case it's at least somewhat realistic that Snape wouldn't be too interested in her... what do wizards do with squib children, anyway? Does anyone know?), is at Hogwarts to teach. And she's not teaching magic, she's teaching fighting. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I would have though wizards defended themselves with spells and hexes, not swords and bows. And where did this fourteen-year-old learn how to use all these various weapons anyway? I'll bet Snape didn't teach her.

Regardless, I'm pretty sure that in any universe it's unacceptable for teachers to get romantically involved with their students. Even when the students are older than they are.

Excuse me, I have to go throw up now. New Sue tomorrow.

SAMPLE: ( Fighting Class. No, Really. )